For the Secondary and Others role, generally the Secondary is an Other who’s fun, good in bed, and relatively drama free, so you basically upgrade an Other. But you can tell them right from the start that you have a girlfriend but have an open relationship and she knows you play around on the side etc. and, as long as you’re high-value, none of those girls give a shit about her and will still fuck you lol You just make sure not to see them too frequently so they don’t fall in love or think you’re falling in love. Like I say, you have to be strict about keeping everyone in their place.
“It seems like you would have to show you were worth keeping before a lady would decide to stick with this arrangement.”
Yup. Basically be an awesome guy who keeps her attracted. When you’re honest from the start that you play around, if she gets involved with you then she’s okay with that (and even attracted to it) on some level…VS taking a super traditional monogamy girl with really strict religious morals who would never date a guy who sees multiple girls to begin with. Essentially her dating you knowing you’re a player is her consenting to this kind of setup.
So from there you simply start being less and less blatant about playing around as you spend more time with her so that eventually you’re seeing her as much and in the same way a boyfriend would, and the other girls have faded to the background and you’re much more discreet about it. If she asks, you be honest, but reassure her that she’s your number one and change the subject ASAP.
A lot of guys’ problem is they date a girl while secretly seeing girls on the side, so that girl thinks they’re monogamous, and then they go “This girl is great but I’m bored, how do I convince her to let me play around?” and it’s like well, you kind of can’t, because you lied to her and hid who you really are to dupe her in, instead of screening for a girl who’s just as cool a chick but knows who you really are (a guy who plays the field).